a special place in a special time
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roomiray56's picture
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Joined: 2018-02-20
Why do we care about someone's opinion on our life?
Hi, there Ladies! I hope you all are doing fine. I've been on this forum for quite a while now. You ladies are really supportive. I'm glad I joined this forum. Today, I want your views on the fact that why do we let others comment on our lives? And when they comment, why does it affect us? I was declared infertile, so I was suggested an IVF. When my family came to know about this, they were strictly against it. Basically, they frowned upon it. They asked me to keep on trying. After a while, I went for the IVF but I hid it from everyone. Obviously, not my husband. Everyone thought its a miracle that I became pregnant. Deep inside, I knew the truth. Now I just think about why I let their opinion affect me? Does anyone think the same here?
Roomi
Debrawell's picture
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Joined: 2018-03-09
It is really great to know that you had your happiness through the IVF. After so much of opposition and discouragement, you finally did what you liked. I really appreciate your guts. I second your opinion that there is no need to harm our emotions for making others happy. We cannot make everyone happy. If you feel that something is really good for you then go for it. Don't let others change your mind.
RachelBranson's picture
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Joined: 2018-01-20
It's a totally fine thing to go with my dear! You did totally right! I've been also having an IVF later this year at a center in Ukraine. Some people are not in my favor but still I'm going for it. It's really my need for now! I just need to take care of myself. So, yeah! I'm going for it! I don't care what people think. I just know how important is this for me. Wish you all the best! xoxo Keep calm and keep going...xx
hannahdavid's picture
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Joined: 2018-03-03
It is a human instinct to do what you did. However, it is very true that we come under pressure. IVF or even surrogacy. Both are considered to be very controversial. I believe that is one of the reasons why I never took anyone's opinion. Neither did I let anyone sympathize with me when nothing was working out. As I knew that people can only talk. They don't know what the person is going through. However are ready to pass irrelevant comments. These comments eventually cause a deepl would. However, when I started visiting this clinic for my surrogacy process. I used to share my feelings with the women there. I knew they would understand me. Honestly speaking it was the best experience as no one was judgmental. The clinic environment was so positive that it changed my life.
emily3432's picture
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Joined: 2018-01-28
Your happiness matters. People's opinions are never important. It depends on us if we wanna make them feel important. They do not really have anything else to do. And they do not really get how being infertile feels. I am glad that you did it anyway.
jennifer's picture
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Joined: 2018-03-11
Hey, I know its hard when your family does not support you. Actually, it is painful. Just dont tell them. Your husband is supporting you then dont care about them. Its hard but you have right to be a mother. Every married woman wants to have babies. I was one of them. I was infertile and so I chose surrogacy. I chose it and so my in-laws were against surrogacy. I wanted a baby at any cost. I took a step against them. I went for surrogacy to Europe. I am a happy mother now and my in-laws love them too. I hope this would help you to feel good. I would just suggest you that you just be happy with the decision.
roomiray56's picture
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Joined: 2018-02-20
Thank you so much for the support ladies. I knew you guys would understand me. It's a relief, honestly. I just wish there are more people out there like the people on this forum. You guys have always loved and supported everyone. I'm so happy that I took a step for myself. I wish no one faces infertility.
Roomi
AnnaBullock's picture
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Joined: 2018-02-21
Hi dear.So happy to know about your positive conceiving.Finally, you had this news.I think it's your right not to interfere and made it hard that you have done things like that or not.Basically, we all know life is hard and horrible without children.Everone wants to have their successful journey.It's up to you what do you want and where you had to go.Just stay positive.I hope that they will understand your condition.It only depends on you and your husband.What have you decided and why?No one had commanded to say you that you are wrong and doing anything wrong.It' your life.If you had to think it's a better option go and ahead.Don't try to make other people happy.Your family is complete and happy if you are satisfied.Wel wishes.
Ava
Ava's picture
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Joined: 2018-03-16
Yes, I do think the same. This is what I often say to people. Let them say their words. You have your own life. And you should decide what option to go for. All these technologies are existing just because they want to let you feel the happiness of parenthood. Why should you be alone all the life? Knowing there are treatments that could help you better. You just can't change everyone's perspectives. But you did that right that you had your DH support over this thing. Thank you for sharing the perfect post.
jazz_roxx's picture
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Joined: 2018-04-18
I know it gets harder when your dear ones do not support you. Actually, it is very disappointing and heartbreaking. Well, all you can do is don't care about them. Your husband is supporting you and this is enough. It's difficult but you have right to have a child. Every couple wants to have a baby. I also wished to have a big family. I was infertile due to some unknown reasons. So, I chose surrogacy as the last option. I went for it and so my in-laws were against surrogacy. I wanted a baby very badly at that time. Everyone disheartened me a lot but I didn't lost the heart. I went to Europe for surrogacy treatment. I am a happy mother now and my in-laws support me too. I hope this will give motivation to you. Wishing you a blast of luck!
salenaj's picture
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Joined: 2018-05-25
I am so glad to hear about you .congratulations on getting pregnant .you got blessed in your life .yes you are right that other people affect you .in some situation they affect us .but don't let others change your decision .it's your life your choice .do whatever you want to do.
Monabaker's picture
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Joined: 2018-04-23
Congrats on the good news. This is nothing to be ashamed of. You should talk to your husband. Tell him that having a baby matters. He shouldn't feel guilty too. You need to accept this publicly. This a blessing in disguise for you guys. Don't disrespect it.
salenaj's picture
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Joined: 2018-05-25
It's great that you find your happiness .the best thing is that it is through IVF. You must have a very rough time. It's not an easy way to go through IVF .it seems to be easy but it is difficult. Only the person who suffers understands the pain. I am very happy for you. Difficulties in your journey make your destination beautiful. Secondly, I am disappointed with you. Why you let others affect your decision .its your life .it's your choice .let people think and say whatever they want to. Don't affect yourself through it. Till then I pray that you get your happiness soon.
blakegreen's picture
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Joined: 2018-02-16
Hi. Hope you are well. This is really disappointing. I had to deal with all this. It used to break my heart. You can't imagine the kinda questions people asked when I started considering this. Its as if they think it is their life, not mine. But I made my peace with it. I didn't let it get the better of me. I've learned something. People talk. We cannot stop them from talking and judging. They don't have anything better to do in their lives. What we can do is not let them affect us. It is great that you went for IVF anyway. Good for you!
AnnaJ's picture
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Joined: 2018-01-20
I think you did the right thing. One should never care about what others think. This is a personal decision and people should respect that. I hope your IVF goes well for you. It has a high success rate and many are going up for it. Just dont take stress about anything. That is not very good for you. Good luck to you. I hope everything goes well. Just make sure to eat well. Eat food that is high in nutrients. Also, make sure to drink lots of water. Good luck to you. Sending baby dust your way.
monika's picture
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Joined: 2018-01-22
Hey, firstly congratulations to you. I am glad that IVF worked for you. I dont think you should let anyone's opinion have an impact on you. Just stay positive and strong. What matters is your own happiness! And I am glad that you did it. It's fine if you didn't tell anyone. Your life and you ae not responsible to answer anyone. How was your IVF experience? Did it all go smoothly? What clinic did you visit? I feel like such questions if answered will help a lot of people. Would be nice if you share your journey. Sending positive vibes your way.

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