Newone gonna share pre-surrogacy frustration, avoid it
Hi all lovely guys! I like this forum and threads. It’s such an amazing
I’m not so long ago here. Anyway I already read many posts. I’m
interested in being here because many of you discuss surrogacy.
This topic means a lot for me now. I didn’t even want to publish my story.
In fact I was encouraged.
Most successful stories inspire to do something. I consider a story as
successful even when somebody just started a journey. I lack of decisiveness.
Actually it’s not the only problem. No matter, let’s continue. I’m
looking for surrogacy.
I’m looking forward to starting it. My husband just spoils my life now.
Everything was started without his help.
But now he becomes a trigger of misfortune. He’s drunk every day. It’s
not the weekend to celebrate.
He has his own feast. He carries it forever. And he doesn’t care at all.
His old mother is a real witch. She is an ugly giggling witch. This woman
ruins our lives and kills her son.
She encourages him to keep on getting drunk. She says he is a man. He knows
better what he should do this time.
The witch is sure I have broken their fate. My fertility problems are just a
reckoning of my sins. I hate her.
Bullshit! If I don’t get anything I deserve in a year I swear I’ll kill
her. Don’t use this information against me.
That’s not fair. Generally I’m quite a positive character. I love flowers
and kids and so on. Okay, I can’t have my own children. It happened due to
my disease. I had purulent endometritis. It is one of the most severe female
diseases. In its developed forms it’s very dangerous and painful. I swear
it is really so.
The doctors had to cut off my womb with uterine appendages. Such surgeries
are very thorough and … and difficult. Anesthesia was very intensive.
I hardly got out of it. I thought it drove me crazy. To be honest I didn’t
understand where I was and what I should do for a week.
All these events were just like hard hit. It was nearly to kill me. But
finally it has changed my lovely husband.
He also wanted to have a baby so much. We often spoke about it. We dreamt of
playing with our children together.
As well I had one IVF before that shit. We didn’t know why we couldn’t
get pregnant for a year. That’s why we applied to gynecologist. ‘
My main problem wasn’t detected. Perhaps it was too early on. In fact IVF
procedure didn’t give result.
I gave amazing response to stimulation. My husband’s sperm had wonderful
quality. There wasn’t any alcohol at all. Today he can release only beer or
gyn. He became a cask full of alcohol. And he smells respectively. Actually I
was devastated after surgery. I was despair completely. I had to fight my
isolation by myself. Nobody supported. None of human beings was beside my
side. This nightmare covered me and wrapped up.
I’m reading your stories and I want to cry out loud. I want to break my
bloody fists. I want being hugged by anyone.
I’m proud of your achievements. They really matter a lot for me. They feed
me with hope for the future.
I believe my future is real. It’ll be brighter and more enjoyable than now.
I even trust my man he will quit drinking.
As you could get it I can’t start. I’m ready. I want to become parent.
However, I just can’t because of circumstances. It seems like vicious
circle. Who can help me to rescue?